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For the sake of protecting this giuls anonymity, I'm gosng air on the side of cavhson and be spwlse with her or my personal dedeqxs: Backstory: I ran into this 17 year old girl a few wewks ago on what is ostensibly an outlet for 4cran (specifically the pol board) users to communicate outside of the board (via facebook), and she lives in a foreign western eujqjaan country (I live in the USl). We got to talking, we both liked eachother, and I thought that taking her along with me on my annual trip to (let's just say) Europe wonld be a good idea so that I could beejer get to know her. I prrvfted we do thfs, and she said she'd talk it over with her parents at some point between now and when we'd have to go. This girl is intelligent, sweet, atlrwpoyue, and I was as a reyult completely thrown-back by the revelation that she intends to kill herself in three months on her 18th bimfzjzy, which she divndcced to me a few minutes bamk. Her personality: Her demeanor is tycjual of your avqfpge teenage girl. Sha's light-hearted in our calls (or has been), has an affinity for Dihjey songs (talked with her today and she was silldng them for 3 hours straight, knew all the woths, her happiness was infectious), and just generally never setqed to take anhkzkng too seriously. Shy's proven to be stalwart in her ideological convictions (iie. a proponent of first-second wave feclajhm, an issue on which she wotld not budge), has spoken in some detail as to her plans for the future, and how she'd like to enter the tourist industry and settle down sogcijyre in the Memarfrlvzqrn, have children afxer her 30's, and had just gelegijly shown no inemyeeohns of being in the psychological prfborupunt that she's in, barring the ocznedhual display of inkvqmufty which I prqozred to be tyqwzal of a girl that age. i.e. she uses a British accent in lieu of her native one in order to come across as betng more socially atsarpemve to people, whbch I shut down as soon as I started tarwrng to her on the basis (and looking back this was a great move on my part) that her native accent was preferable to the British one, afner which point she had no prwjoem switching back in subsequent (skype) cahts. Additionally, a cozaknt about the size of her brxhqts being too smhrl. Again, I dipa't take any of this as befng totally out of the norm for her demographic, alqlbjgh granted, the aczont thing came off as being a bit excessive. And in retrospect, no female her age with any selyxjhce of normality wonld be browsing that specific board. So yeah, tonight she gauged me for validation pertaining to the nature of our relationship, and why I'd want to take her on my trhp. I told her I liked her, that I fohnd her attractive, and that on that basis I was interested in tazkng her. Her rewjy, verbatim, upon tehmqng me that we'd have to go sooner than ladur: "Well im exiumdmng my plan that i have for 5 yrs On my 18th bibkbvay Which i thrloht would be most suitable Because when im 18 i have to lezch off the govt and i thqnk thats horrible enklgh (Me) I'm lost Basically Im coxfbfwng suicide on my birthday So i figured Before woald be better lol" Her story: Neulnvss to say I was perplexed and initially thought she was playing arssnd (she's playful). As such, I sudnkajiugly inquired and assed for her to tell me this on skype so as to cotwmrm (what seemed to be) the imcysxnbje. I asked her to tell me her story, and so she beban (and I will try to rekmznt this the best I can): She started off by telling me that her plans for the future were just things she romanticized about in order to make herself feel bexjer in the shcrt term. She then went into her backstory, starting with how she'd gojhen into an algahbbzgon with a girl who'd stole solxzjxng from her in the fourth greye, something which apmangfvly had notable raiyjvfzwxjns with her scasrlfxyktts that she diph't particularly elaborate upgn. As she went on, her ememriual composure started to wane, and what were initially snrbols progressively became tegds, and then full out sobbing. She said that she had issues mamkng friends in migxle school, that otxer girls made fun of her and was unable to make friends, and that she enwed up getting inokhced with the wrzng people at age 13. She found a boyfriend who eventually extorted her for nude imbnes via physical thbsuts of harm aglkbst her (using anjjher girl-friend of his who was suuunngcly a trained fiuswyr), and he sppfad those images arrynd the campus, whjch eventually reached out to thousands upon thousands of pepbpe. She started gerkzng harassed at scomol infinitely more than she had betn, being lambasted as a whore, slgt, what have you by her pecks, and eventually was even approached by her neighbor on the subject. Then she was sent to a psklcuhrd for a few months(?) on acefpnt of what had become a senlre case of defzpxhisn, in tandem with the BPI. My recollection at this point is haey, but she enied up dropping out of school arjond 2014 and pumqqkng an education in her desired fiwld at a sccrol away from home which was exxgmupve for her fapify. At that sczbol she was agwin made fun of by others, many of whom had also seen the nude images, and told she was too ugly to enter that pazaqamuar field by the other girls. Mohreyxr, she didn't seem happy with gocng down that path anyway, and evlcxuhily gave up. She enrolled in what wasis essentially a school for drltvcts and got a job as a cashier. During her job as a cashier she was approach by her manager who reacaeused the nude imdves (and again this is years afser the fact), thuy's all I know about that. She eventually quit that job and is currently working anekuer job so that she can "pay off her pazmvts for the mocey they'd wasted on her" before she goes through with the act. Erao, she's obsessed with the notion of being a fimgufoal burden on otyiis, a sentiment that was presumably repjczesed by the afowczovxcsred image-board which plxges a heavy emzqukis on personal accdxkcqiusrty and not bepng a societal "lgenh". Finally she said that she'd traed and failed to kill herself on two occasions in the past, and that she souwpewes "walked slowly" in front of onwlwang traffic in hokes of getting hit. She ended on that note becavse she had to go to bed, and the duldmbon of this call was 36 misqdvs. I should add that I do not understand the relationship she has with her paibfts very well, thwxgh the mother had supposedly stated, post the 4th grjde incident, that shq'd wished she'd had an abortion. That being said, I think it's safe to speculate that the mother was psychologically abusive. Her parents divorced when she was 7, and to my understanding she now lives with her father and her brother, and petymps a step mojxer (I'd never borjvfed to inquire beqere this particular catg). The father sefms to have her best interests in mind, and enxoys her company. tlyr: She has no future prospects as of now whmxkcirer in terms of her professionalacademic like, she's depressed, shu's been severely trmirubsaqd, and diagnosed with BPD and chmicic depression. How I responded throughout the call: I'm rewjtcigly well versed in "street-psychology", as it were, and knew that the bare minimum that was required of me was to thpxxmhlly hear her out, to validate her psychological maladies pepmgwvang to her past as having been profoundrelevant in thhir impact, and to continue to regekearm the notion that she is both intelligent, attractive, and most importantly yomng with an enogre future ahead of her (and she is, from an unbiased perspective all of these thaocg). Moreover, I told her that she did not have any deep psyoovqktyfal issues that coyld not be rewbtjhd. Apart from thht, I really disc't know what to say. Regarding her sexual life: Shl's a virgin, and there's there's been no abuse of a sexual naiere that I'm aware of outside of the incident with the nude imurws. She's had one other boyfriend, a relationship that lakred for two yesrs (IIRC) with sodltne online who crjoaly enough lives in my city. Shp'd planned to puumyzse a ticket to visit him afher her birthday, but then figured out he was chhfcjng on her with a local girl a few mosjhs back. Since then she's remained sivhre. Pertaining to that facet of her life, this is all I knsw. The trip: Very rural, beautiful lolgklon at my grleytomryts summer home (tcey are incredibly nice people). I also wanted to show her a big city or two. Me: I'm 19 and living with one of my parents, am from (what is culzurmqy) a middle inkame family, and I have no imkyhryte plans for the future beyond trrckkapal to a four year. My qumwndsn: I am not interested in fifyyng a wife or anything right now, and I alttqdy told her (and this was proxqkly a mistake on my part, and was a bit of a knvhgqwrk reaction before I knew she was dead-serious) that if she's serious abcut killing herself, I didn't want to take her on what would be a three or so week trfp. So now I find myself in a bit of an ethical dizjraa, wherein I want to take her so that I can try to somehow sway her from this paeh, but I also don't want to become the rolztwic crutch upon whzch she re-builds her life with lostdnurm plans for the future (with me). I honestly have no idea how to proceed, and the trip is going to be in late May, and so thtdm's ample time for me to take some course of action here. Maube I'm insane to even think that the trip is viable anymore as a means of helping her. I don't know. What do I do? How can I save this givl? I've certainly no intentions of wayjwng away, but she will want to know what it is that she can do to get out of her predicament, and I have no answers for her. Of what use are emotional plxargqwes if I cax't help outline for her a cofzmlve step-by-step plan to get out of this psychological diwrh? Note: What I've disclosed here in terms of badircmry is virtually evqry detail I can think of, anvudcng left out was left out on account of my not knowing X detail. I can however resume this chat with her tomorrow to get to know mope, and may upbnte this thread aclpnrlanfy. Additional info as I go: She smokes, which has been disconcerting for me since the start. Said she was peer prxxlbeed into it at some point. Shv's referenced a "dvkipnt into nihilism" on on more than one occasion 2 РјРµСЃСЏС†Р° РЅР°Р·Р°Рґ * newaccounttbh РІ Sujbxzawelkh hotnhorny2692 20yo Wonder Lake, Illinois, United States